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Are you constantly feeling paranoid, thinking about the possibility of getting cheated on non-stop? And is it driving you crazy to the point you can’t stop thinking about it?
Say no more! This article is made just for you.
Why trust matters in relationships
We all trust at different rates, especially in our romantic endeavors.
Some people jump right in and give their confidence to their partner right away. While for others, it may take what seems like forever to open up and be vulnerable.
Either way, we’ve all probably had nightmares of our partner cheating on us at some point.
But if you always grind your teeth or get heartbroken over and over again with this endless fear, it can get tough to handle.
Not to mention it can significantly affect your partner, your relationship, and your quality of life.
But why is this happening? Is there truly a way to stop it?
Well, I’ve listed some pointers to enlighten you and help you get out of this cyclical behavior.
5 ways to stop thinking about getting cheated on
I completely understand how confusing and painful it may be for you to continually have these thoughts.
And even if you know they’re not real, it still hurts badly, especially when they come up ever so frequently.
It’s like you can’t have peaceful quality time with your partner without these uninvited dark thoughts suddenly creeping in.
Mind you, this happens even when there are no concrete clues or reasons at all!
And even the strongest bonds and the most secured relationships can suffer from this matter.
So, take heart. Know that you’re not crazy for thinking this way.
With that said, if you’re constantly worried and can’t stop thinking about the possibility of being cheated on, here are some tips you can use for yourself and your relationship.
1. Ask yourself why you’re feeling this way.
Understand yourself a little deeper and learn how your brain works.
Sometimes, it can get difficult to tap into our inner thoughts and revisit painful memories.
However, these could open up the much-needed clarity that can help you recognize why you’re feeling and thinking this way.
So, you may want to take the time and ponder on these possible reasons below.
Family background and culture
Have you been exposed to parental infidelity or abuse as a child? Did you see your relatives and even friends engaging in extramarital affairs?
Has it seemed that unfaithful people aren’t criticized in your family culture?
All these experiences can brew trust issues in your guts that can make you feel paranoid about your partner having an affair.
Prior traumatic events
Perhaps you had gone through something life-threatening when you were younger. This will create trauma that can affect all facets of your life, including relationships.
You may be unconsciously protecting yourself from possible future pain because that’s what you’re used to.
Partner’s cheating history
Whether you know that your partner has cheated in their past relationships or has cheated on you before, you may feel jaded, anxious, and cynical about them.
You may constantly be thinking about getting cheated on again non-stop, worried about history repeating itself, and you’d end up going through what’s seemingly an inevitable betrayal sooner or later.
The thought of that person as someone capable of infidelity may make you feel extra vulnerable, so you begin overthinking this possibility.
That usually indicates that your relationship isn’t truly over what happened in the past, and you still have lingering trust issues.
In this case, relationship coaching may be able to help you two tie up these loose ends. Read more about it here.
Experiences of being cheated on
If infidelity has interfered with most or all of your past relationships, this may also be why it’s difficult for you to trust now.
In fact, it may take only one cheater to lace you with these irrational thoughts even when you’re with someone trustworthy.
In fact, a study even shows that being cheated on can lead to PTSD, which can wreak havoc on your mental health! This romantic betrayal is among the most difficult to heal from and let go of.
2. Logically check the authenticity of your concerns.
Now that you know the possible reasons for your thoughts, it’s time to assess whether you’re facing real threats in your relationship or there are inner workings you need to attend to.
Take some time to yourself and reflect on why you are having such intrusive thoughts.
Has something been triggering your insecurities? Are his actions suspicious lately?
You must see your problem with a clearer set of eyes and rationally evaluate what’s happening around your current relationship.
Easier said than done, I know. But once you’ve figured this out, you’ll be setting yourself and your relationship free from these unhealthy thoughts.
What you have now is different from your past relationships, and so, whatever has happened before isn’t guaranteed to happen again.
3. Notice how overthinking is taking a toll on you.
You must understand that you are worthy of genuine love and a healthy relationship where you feel secure.
If the other person is bound to cheat on you, there’s pretty much nothing you can do about it. So you must understand that it’s pointless to be thinking about being cheated on non-stop.
Sometimes, our imaginations also get so ahead of us that we start to believe them. Unfortunately, this can take a toll on our lives.
Try to use some self-soothing techniques when you start to catch yourself getting into these cyclical thoughts.
Remember that just because you think of it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s true.
4. Talk to your partner about it.
This will not be easy as there’s a high chance for your partner to misunderstand your confession as an attack or accusation.
But remember that your partner deserves to know what you’re going through.
And who knows? He may be able to soothe your troubled mind. So remember, communicate, communicate, communicate!
Tell them what’s bothering you and how you’re confused about why you’re having these thoughts as well.
Find the courage to open up and be honest about what you feel. Sometimes, we just need reassurance, and you must be able to tell your partner that.
5. It always pays to ask for help.
Whether or not your suspicions are true, it pays to talk to someone about this experience.
You’re likely to need mental support from your loved ones and even guidance from a professional.
Acknowledge these fears and learn about the healthy coping mechanisms you can practice.
It’s better if you can confront your fears head-on instead of hurting yourself and your partner in the long run.
You are capable of healing, but you must put your mind and heart to it.
Don’t forget to take care of yourself. Believe that you are your own person no matter what happens, and you will get through everything!
If you are paranoid about being cheated on, you must try to understand and confront the source of your paranoia and comprehend that it’s likely an irrational fear.
And if that fails, you can always rely on relationship coaching to help you navigate through the depths of your fears.